wolfcoat.co.uk

When's Your Dolmio Day?

2011-11-17T21:12:00.005Z

Well these couple of belters come from local hero, G2Hero (https://twitter.com/#!/g2hero). Thank you sir!

The first photo shows the classic cool of a true wolfcoat. Unfortunately, this wolf wearing munta has not been so cool with her bait selection... Dolmio sauce. Dolmio fucking sauce!? Lazy twat can't even be bothered to...

Heat a couple of glugs of olive oil in a hot pan then finely slice a clove of garlic and fry with a pinch of seasalt until translucent (do not let the garlic burn). Then add a tin of Napolina chopped tomatoes (don't be tempted by the 16p Asda own brand, they are as thin as piss). Next add a small handful of torn basil leaves, a pinch of ground italian pepper and a couple of pinches of oregano, then simmer for around 10 minutes.

Next up...

I have it on good authority that the reason this photo was taken at distance was because this winter wooly warmer wearer was one vicious mutha.

Shortly before this photo was taken, she devoured the previous wolfcoat mutant in Asda car park, along with the Dolmio... This snap captures her checking the doors of disabled Asda shoppers for fig rolls. The heartless cow.

Otter & Tabs

2011-09-15T08:23:00.003+01:00

This chump was nil impressed when I asked if I could take a photo of his Autumn Otter Awesomeness. So much so, that he turned his back on me like a discarded chicken parmo on the streets of Teeside on a weeknight.

However, all was not lost as he revealed the true awesomeness of this otter extravaganza! I did not hang about though, as shortly after this photo was taken he pulled a badger from within the lining of his awesome awesome coat and made the poor little critter smoke 40 tabs straight from his sweaty mitt. The bastard!

Dead Sea Mob Double Header!

2011-06-10T23:55:00.005+01:00

Well well well. A double header of desireable wolf coats from the Dead Sea Mob...

First off, we have this beautifully arrogant arrangement. If we were playing bullshit bingo, this coat would have it all. Wolves, snow, trees and moon. Fuck me, this is a winner.

On a side note, it would seem that the bystanders to this bint are distracted by the wares available on the stall in front. Well I have it on good authority that concealed from view is an outdoor lap dancing venue for voles and gerbils. The sick bastards!

Next up is this blue Brighton belter!

Once again, the wolfcoat photographer has been cool enough to conceal the wearer’s identity (as mentioned in a previous post, this is a dangerous business – see goat).

Anyway, back to this wolf wearer’s story… It would seem that this wife’s hubby is bemused at the lack of tarragon in the trolley. But little does he know that Tesco Extra doesn’t sell fucking tarragon and that they now have to go all the way to posh fucking Sainsbury’s for their perennial herb…

Cat amongst the... lighting section...

2010-11-18T12:58:00.002Z

Well, well, well. A beautiful first capture for our newest wolfcoat member...

"when Carole and I were out shopping in Redcar today we came across the attached beauty. It took me ages to catch up to her and I was really shifting around the store. It was only when I managed to corner her that I realised that she was jet propelled using her GT Zimmer frame with wheels. Although her coat looked and smelled like real cat fur she assured me that no cats had been harmed in its manufacture, a point I found difficult to believe."

Fife Fido Fleece!

2010-04-27T23:14:00.005+01:00

This photo was sent to me from a cheese pasty eating, wolfcoat.co.uk fan from up the road in Scotland. It is a close-up of a very delicious and popular puppy coat that was captured in the fantastically scaffy area of Fife. To be honest, I'm surprised the photographer was able to get as close as they did without being sick as the folk who normally wear these coats stink of piss...

Hungry like a Wolf

2010-03-03T16:09:00.002Z

Ok, so here we have a pack of wolves hunting for their midnight snack. Now to the coat... here we have a pack of wolves hunting... Anyway, this terrible twosome caused havoc in Morrisions the other day, showing complete disregard to your wolfcoat writer, these fat trumpeteers bustled their way through the isles filling every available crevise with what can only be described as a dead smell. Bamps!

Goat Coat

2010-02-17T22:05:00.003Z

Just when you thought they had went into hibernation, this feisty little number pops up. Complete with hood (a first for wolfcoat.co.uk) a mountain goat stands proud beneath her wilderness. Fantastic! Unfortunately, shortly after this photo was taken, her bodyguard swung for me with his bag of broken biscuits. Custard creams, bourbons and those pink wafer things strewn across Park View shopping centre in Whitley Bay. This job gets more dangerous by the day...

Owl About That Then?

2010-01-03T20:49:00.003Z

T-wit, T-wooooo! My first Owlcoat swooped in over Xmas with this maginificent parliament of owls scene. When I asked this wife to "watch the birdie" while I took her photo, she responded by saying "Are you the bastards from Wolfcoat.co.uk?" and flicked me the bird!!! Nice...

N.B. Note the gully shit mark in between her shoulder blades. Must be a scratch and sniff coat...

It's CHHRRIIIIISSSTMMMAAAAAASSSSSS!!!!!!!!!!

2009-12-19T17:33:00.004Z

After narrowly averting a serious accident with a be-pianoed nun, this festive fleece was spotted in Grainger Market. I was initially blind-sided by this christmas whore as she was heading out of sight, until the thick get stopped to look at some christmas cards!!!

Upon commending her seasonal stylings, she informed me that this was her back-up fleece. Her first choice nativity fleece was at Johnson's dry cleaners having a yuletide log removed, which had been laid across Our Lord Baby Jesus' forehead.

Amen.

Big Bad Wolf Shocker 2

2009-12-17T10:04:00.005Z

Well touch my giblets and call be Storrint! Surely this isn't the same wolf as the last one??? Well, it's the same type of coat, but a different wife. This bish came out of the Thomas Cook across the road skipping and flapping her coat around like a gypsy who'd just found a gold tooth. When asked if she'd like to be a part of Wolfcoat.co.uk she said that she'd love to, but was already late for the Shakira concert at the Berkely Tavern in Whitley Bay. Her loss...

Big Bad Wolf Shocker

2009-12-14T22:45:00.005Z

Well I wasn't expecting that. It was on my last post, only an hour ago, that I predicted such an awe-inspiring sighting. This candid snapshot of wolves in their natural habitat was a truly beautiful sight.

The leader of the pack consumes most of the image. I bet he's a right lazy bastard; never taking the bins out, and that. I think this is a disgusting abuse of power, which is prevalent amongst wolf communities. He should be ashamed of himself and all his kind. The little arsehole.

Midnight Caller

2009-12-14T21:52:00.005Z

Don't be fooled by the apparent lack of detail, no clarity has been lost. This is purely a silhouette design. I think you'll agree that this particular fleece has taken the wolf coat to another level. What will be next? Perhaps a pack of wolves enjoying midnight respite in a snow-laden forest of trees, gauntly stripped to their frost-scarred bark? (That's the trees, not the wolves.)

Thieving Gypsy Hor(se)

2009-12-07T23:11:00.005Z

This timid little get became startled as I took the snap, then bolted off, galloping through the security barriers of HMV without paying for a Champion The Wonder Horse box set. Neither of the security guards had a hope of catching her, as the going was good-to-firm for the 3:15 at Swalwell.

Le Premier Wolf Coat

2009-12-01T23:14:00.000Z

My first wolf coat and what a belter! Caught this bitch hanging out in "The Bay" - she thinks she's hard as fuck cos she has the only proper wolfie in the hood. Ticks all the boxes: classic montage effect with baying action to add a bit of drama. It doesn't get any better than this.

Oompa Loompa Woofla

2009-12-01T22:44:00.002Z

Caught these two oompa loompas stealing Linda McCartney sausages from Holland & Barrett. Chased after them for a bit to get a photo (well I say chased, they were absolutely pegging it as fast as their little stumps could carry them, and I was simply strolling, I nearly overtook them to be honest).

Best Wolf Yet!

2009-11-23T11:48:00.003Z

This is the best wolfcoat I have ever seen in my life, period! I nearly wet myself when I saw this. Great colours, wolves, trees, snow... amazing! This person has real taste. This ain't no Nanna wearing Crocs or trackie bottoms, this is a Nanna who rocks a beret with her wolfcoat. Nanna, we salute you!

Pull over your polar pullover...

2009-11-12T21:11:00.006Z

Quite a good action shot, here. These two were sighted scurrying through a themed shopping mall. A big thanks must go to the scouting team, for it is their eagle-eyes which help bring lasting pleasure to us all. After a short chin-wag with its owner, I was pleased to be informed that no polar bears were harmed during the jumper's manufacture. Though a tarpaulin was fatally injured during the stressing process of the fellow's jeans. The faces have been changed to avoid lynch mobbing.

Dog Ruff

2009-11-10T21:16:00.005Z

Passed through Blyth today and just knew I'd see a wolfcoat. This one's a poor man's fleece. The repetative design is a give away. I can't make out whether the jacket is meant to be faded, or it's been out in the sun too long. Anyway, got a good price on it as I pointed out to the sales wife that the second puppy from the right had recently had surgery, had a zipper fitted and needed a good home...

Kitten Coat and Crocs

2009-11-04T22:37:00.004Z

Well this one took some getting. Chased this one around Whitley Bay like a kitten with a ball of wool. Very similar to the Dog coat I caught last week, and the added bonus of a pair "Crocs" made it all worth while.

Picture the Scene...

2009-10-22T15:22:00.003+01:00

Not a great shot I know. Don't think this one had any animals on as it was just pine trees and shit. If you're going to buy one of these fleece type muthas, then at least have a freakin animal on it so I can catagorize it on wolfcoat.co.uk. Bloody hell. Some people...

Mad Wolf

2009-10-22T15:17:00.003+01:00

This fella didn't even realise there was a wolf on his hood until I pointed it out. Apparently, he got it in Primark! Owoooooooo!

They're GRRREAT!!!!

2009-10-14T20:52:00.016+01:00

Nearly 4 fruitless hours had elapsed when, out from the darkness (and the tundra), popped these two..........

Mere moments apart, these excellent specimens were spotted on the escalator at Eldon Square's St George's Way (the tiger going up, and the penguins coming down). All hail the pedestrian bottle-neck. These images were captured as a result of extensive team-working.

Surf 'N' Snow

2009-10-13T09:50:00.002+01:00

This was quite a sneaky shot, as I tried not to alert the attention of Pauly, Durham's very own wolfcoat protection racketeer. Notice the lupine/delphine harmony knit.

Puppy Love

2009-10-12T20:59:00.002+01:00

Can't believe I got two in one day. I had to speed walk to catch up with this one. The top and bottom border of paw prints puts this one in the top drawer. When asked about her earmuffs, she said that she got them free with the coat!

Stallion Bracket

2009-10-12T20:54:00.000+01:00

Snapped this belter when walking through Whitley Bay. Has the classic montage effect. Think she was looking to buy those lemon slip-ons in the window to go with them. I talked her out of it though...